Reflection: Good Friday Birthday
It’s been quite a while since I have written a blog post of any sort, and it has not been for what I would say was a lack of content. Sometimes in the midst of living out the stories of our lives, we either just don’t make the time for adequate reflection, or that reflection does not get transcribed from thoughts in the mind into the written word. For me, the reflection has been happening, but the transcription has not…
That being said, I felt like the fact that Good Friday and my birthday fell on the same day this year offered an interesting opportunity not only for reflection but for putting those reflections down in written word. I actually did a quick Google search, and this is the first time it has happened since 1956 (I wasn’t around for that occasion, but my parents were). It was just ten years ago on Good Friday that I met up with my friends Jake, John, and Wes to talk about the launch of Nuru, to reflect on the crucifixion, and on a lighter note, to prepare to watch WVU beat Duke in the NCAA tournament! Taking time to pause on Good Friday has been a longstanding tradition for me, but combining it with my birthday added to the uniqueness of it this year.
This year I celebrated my “Jerry West” birthday (44 for years of life)! Interestingly, there are 45 days inclusive from Ash Wednesday to Good Friday, so I’m taking that is a reminder to be mindful of the future as I rest in the present. Of course, as part of my birthday tradition, I dropped to the ground to perform my age in push-ups, plus one for the year ahead as well. There are routines like this that I hope to continue throughout my annual rhythms, and new ones that I hope to cultivate as well; one of them emerged on my birthday, not so much as an annual tradition but a daily aspiration.
Over the last decade, during the Lenten season, I’ve spent my mornings walking through an eight-week devotional book called Developing Intimacy With God by a man named Alex Aronis. I highly recommend the book. It was recommended to me by my friend JR Woodward as I was considering a pretty significant career decision, and I’ve been through a book a dozen times since that introduction.
During my reading yesterday, the focus was on the seven last statements of Jesus. This one struck me in particular as I was reading. Father forgive them, for they know not what they do. This particular phrase, being spoken by Jesus as He was being crucified, mocked, ridiculed, and his garments were being divided and people were casting lots for them, struck me because of all of the layers of meaning that seemed to be captured within it. While I believe the words of scripture have an enduring and timeless aspect to them, I also believe that they have a lot to teach in the present moment and the particularities of today. For instance, when Jesus spoke these words, I doubt that most of those who mocked, pierced, and cast lots realized they were doing this to the Messiah.
At the same time, I think there is an indictment on each of us. His imploring is as much for us as it is for those people surrounding him. As much as we would like to say we know exactly what we are doing—nobody likes the thought of being somewhat naïve or ignorant to what they are doing—I think many times we speak and we act without thinking or fully grasping the weight and implications of our words and actions.
- We write scathing comments on social media without much concern for how it might affect someone on the other end of our remarks—we don’t know what we are doing.
- In the silence of others, we fill in a narrative of our own creation to belittle and alienate them, we don’t know what we are doing.
- We don’t give our full presence to the moments that are unfolding in our lives, and those moments are magical; we don’t know what we are doing.
- We stop having meaningful conversations, and we become one another’s accusers, when deep down each of us cries out from our soul for an Advocate; we don’t know what we are doing.
- We choose to regularly eat unhealthy foods, or neglect our fitness and wellness, and end up planting seeds for disease and sickness in our lives that will one day be reaped to this dismay of ourselves and our loved ones; we don’t know what we are doing.
In these and in many other ways, we are needing of forgiveness. Sometimes we know exactly what we are doing, and there’s a depth of malevolence present, but many times we are unaware of the full scope of what our actions are doing to ourselves and to others. As I was reading these words of Jesus on my birthday, I felt like it gave me a space to slow down and consider how many times in my life, I have made choices, that if I had fully considered their implications, I would like to think I would have chosen differently. I’m sure that is the case for each of us. I’m not writing these words out of a sense of guilt as much as a reminder that each of us should make every attempt to tread a little more lightly and speak and act with greater gentleness toward one another and toward ourselves, because we truly do not know what we are doing much of the time.
As I consider the years that have transpired in my life, and like each of us, with no guarantee of how many years, days, hours, or seconds I have left to draw breath, make choices, speak, and act, I hope to live the remaining moments of my life with greater intentionality, with graciousness, and with a greater cognizance of my surroundings in the present, and I hope the same for you. May we each walk with greater gentleness, and may we be quick to forgive and to care for one another as best we can. From where I sit, it seems like the world could use a lot more of that.